
When I woke up this morning there was a fresh coat of snow on the ground here. Anywhere from 6 to 8 inches to be exact. So I wasn’t going to go out today but I heard a ruckass from across the street when I first got up around 6:30 or so. so I went out to investigate.. There were two guys.. Supposedly two grown men arguing rather loudly. About of all things, the snow. I couldn’t repeat word for word what the conversation was about. But to me it made about as much sense as the one that I wrote below. I’m not kidding, this is what the actual conversation reminded me of... people are strange indeed.
Dipshit: “Hey where in the F**k did all of this snow come from?”
Dork: “ The sky I’m guessing.”
Dipshit: “You don’t have to be a wise ass Dork!”
Dork: “Well that was a stupid ass question.. What do I look like the channel 2 weather man?”
Dipshit: “Are you saying I’m stupid?”
Dork: “Well.. If the snowshoe fits.”
Dipshit: “Ok.. Now you’ve offended me.”
Dork: “How did I offend you?”
Dipshit: “You insinuated that I was stupid.”
Dork: “You called me a wise ass.”
Dipshit: “I could have called you dumb ass.”
Dork: “Ok. Now I’m offended!”
Dipshit: “You can’t be offended.. I was offended first.”
Dork: “Well.. I am offended by your offensiveness.”
Dipshit: “But YOUR offensiveness offended me first in an offensive way.”
Dork: “Did not.”
Dipshit:’ And furthermore.. Now you are trying to defend your offensiveness in an offensive manner!”
Dork: “ But you didn’t care that you offended me.”
Dipshit: “That’s because you offended me first.”
A passing motorist honks his horn at the two morons and tells them to get the hell out of the street before someone runs them both over, all while flipping them the bird.
Dipshit: “Hey Dork? “
Dork: “What?’
Dipshit: “What do you suppose crawled up THAT guys butt?”
Dork: “ I dunno Dipshit.. Maybe we offended him.”
Dipshit: “Some People are so touchy.”
I know. I know. I didn’t get it either, but the scary part is, it makes more sense than the two guys arguing across the street did. I honestly wonder sometimes how people have managed to survive each other for so long . Hope everyone has a great Sunday.
~Scratch~