It didn’t take long to figure out that the ringing bell was coming from land. We just couldn’t see it through all of the fog. And when we’d run aground it didn’t take long for the local natives to show themselves. Giggling and cackling they came seemingly from everywhere, pointed hat wearing gnarly looking snaggle toothed little people. A little short fat one lead their charge on our vessel, and before long they’d had us completely surrounded. He’d called himself Googee, and he told us that he was the leader of the Blog Gnomes. I thought about that for a second.. Blog Gnomes? What in the blue hell is a Blog Gnome?. Googee told us that they had been in the Triangle for as long as the internet had existed, and that every time a wayward blog post would find itself here, they would scoop them up and take them underground where they would remain buried forever. They had never seen real people before and now they were going to take us all prisoner. But I could tell by the way Googee was staring at doctor Feelgoddess that he was ready to make a deal.
“Saaaay… She’s a real cutey.” he snarled. “You give us the blond floozy, and the rest of you can go back to the Blogstream unharmed.”
Oh foolish little Blog Gnome, he never saw it coming, but I knew what was coming and even ol Barney Fife cringed at the word Floozy. She moved to his left giving him an angry stare, and he was unaware that he was being lined up for the field goal attempt. And with the precision and cunning of a cat, she stepped forward burying her foot between his stubby little legs. And the force of her kick sent him flying a full thirty feet into the air and probably a distance of 35 yards. The visual alone, drew a painful collective groan from the crowd of remaining Gnomes, but it wasn’t until they all put their pointed little fingers upon their crotches that we realized that they were all little boy Gnomes. Our beautiful Blond Doctor moved angrily towards the crowd, and they bravely ran away. Barney and I in all of our manly glory had every intention of helping her capture and secure a prisoner, if we could have stopped laughing long enough. She reemerged from the jungle dragging the little goober by his foot on the ground behind her, his pointed little head bouncing off of the rocks as the angry doctor drug him back to the vessel. She towered above it .
“Alright you little creep. We came here to find the lost blog posts.. And your gonna tell us where they are, or I’m going to show you how we PUNT the football.. Got it?”
“I can’t do that.” he told us. “Once the Posts are all buried they’re gone for good.” all of this time. Friggin pirating little Blog Gnomes have been high jacking our Posts from here in the Triangle.. Who would have figured.
